{"id":1654,"date":"2025-01-08T08:30:49","date_gmt":"2025-01-08T08:30:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fabulousbeirut.com\/?p=1654"},"modified":"2025-06-27T10:46:39","modified_gmt":"2025-06-27T10:46:39","slug":"mademoiselle-julia-chapter-two","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fabulousbeirut.com\/ar\/mademoiselle-julia-chapter-two\/","title":{"rendered":"Mademoiselle Julia &#8211; Chapter two"},"content":{"rendered":"<pre class=\"wp-block-verse has-ast-global-color-8-color has-luminous-vivid-orange-background-color has-text-color has-background has-link-color has-medium-font-size wp-elements-50892a8c9ac0732aab4249950f1a14c4\" style=\"font-style:italic;font-weight:600\">My name is Mademoiselle Julia.<br>I assassinate people for money.<br>More or less.<br>I take care of my ageing father.<br>He thinks he is an emperor.<br><br>I am a show girl.<br>More or less.<br><br>I long for an ordinary life.<br><br>I must find a way to escape.<br>Take my ageing father with me.<br>Stop the blood that sheds continuously and mercilessly.<br><br>And with no regret.<br><br>I am walking in a crowded street.<br>A busy neighborhood.<br>I stop under a two - floored building and I call out the name of a man.<br><br>A slender figure suddenly appears on the balcony of the first floor.<br><br>A young man with wavy hair and a loving smile sweetly asks:<br><br>\"What do you want Mademoiselle Julia?\"<br>I scream: \"Cheap sex\".<br><br>Suddenly I am 22.<br>My hair is severely pulled back in a knot.<br>I love fiercely, and my heart is repeatedly broken.<br><br>I am 22, and everybody passes in front of my hunger except you.<br><br>Stories that don't really happen are also love stories.<br>And I have aged, haven't I?<br><br>All my life I believed there was a cabaret dancer named Martha living inside my head.<br><br>On the fringe of schizophrenia.<br>Thank God I remained on the fringe.<br>No, Sir. I do not dance ballet.<br>I dance in the cabaret.<br>I belong in the realms of greatness.<br>I cannot end this way.<br><br>I feed the hungry stray dogs and cats in the empty streets of a dead city.<br><br>Please get me out of here.<br><br>My father paces the rooms of our old house in the dead city.<br><br>He is busy proving to himself that he has remained alone all his life.<br><br>Suddenly I am kneeling on my uncle Simon's grave.<br>I whisper softly: \"Don't be sad because you were always alone. In the end, we all are\".<br><br>My name is Mademoiselle Julia.<br>I do not exist.<br>I live inside the mind of a woman who used to dream.<br><br>One day I decide to change everything and move back to the country.<br>I pack my bags and persuade my ageing father to come with me.<br><br>For years I have been in love with a man who doesn't see me at all.<br>My father and I are waiting for the train.<br>My father thinks we are going to conquer new lands.<br><br>More or less.<br><br>I am wearing a small hat.<br><br>Ready to embark on what seems like a new adventure.<br><br>I shall stop assassinating people for money and I shall grow vegetables.<br><br>\"Him, he doesn't see me at all\", I whisper to my father.<br><br>Suddenly I am 22.<br>I am going to be a great actress.<br>But I am too afraid to be anything.<br>I do not even know that I am supposed to carry a handbag like proper young ladies do.<br><br>Instead, I place my stuff in a plastic bag.<br><br>My father decides that I am going to be a journalist.<br>I am too scared to be anything.<br>Yet, I have inherited his arrogance, perseverance.<br>And my mother's anger.<br><br>I am addicted to beginnings.<br>Yet, I suffocate if someone loves me.<br>My father loves me.<br>Too much.<br><br>I run away from him.<br>And he places his love delicately on top of my head.<br>And crushes me with it.<br><br>My name is Mademoiselle Julia.<br>I live inside the mind of a woman who used to dream.<br>I live for pleasure.<br>To give it.<br>To receive it.<br><br>I look at myself in the mirror.<br>My body is voluptuous.<br>I am in the mood for love.<br>Continuously.<br>I lather my body with velvety cream.<br>My Chanel numero cinq transforms the inevitable sweat created by desire into audible sighs.<br>My nails are painted with burgundy red.<br>My lips betray the sins I have ferociously devoured.<br>I slowly lift my skirt and offer my hungry flesh to be loved and covered with his weight.<br>He lifts my leg and it rests on his shoulders.<br><br>My name is Mademoiselle Julia.<br>I do not exist.<br>I live inside the mind of a woman who hasn't been one in a long time.<br>I might escape.<br>The church bells are ringing.<br>The storm has brought with it a frightening cold.<br><br>Almost a year ago, I lost my father, although he is still alive.<br>I saw him fly across the room.<br>Something hit me on the head.<br>When I managed to remove the blood from my face, my father had already died, although he remained alive.<br>He was replaced by a frail creature with hollow eyes, stretching his hand towards me.<br><br>Suddenly I am 22.<br>Maybe it was not such a bad idea to have been tricked by my father into becoming a journalist.<br>My hair is severely tied back in a knot.<br>I give my body freely to those I love.<br>I only give my soul to those who do not love me in return.<br><br>Suddenly I am in our old apartment in Beirut.<br>My father is praying to Saint Elias.<br>Mumbling his fears to his favorite Saint.<br><br>I quietly approach him and tell him reassuringly:<br>\"Don't be afraid of death, dad. I died a long time ago. It's not so bad\".<br><br>My name is Mademoiselle Julia.<br>I am a writer.<br>More or less.<br><br>I sit in a deserted cafe by the beach and I slowly sip my coffee.<br>I am writing my memoirs.<br>Trying to understand all that has happened.<br>Waiting for all that is yet to happen.<br>I do not exist outside the mind of a woman who used to dream.<br><br>Tonight it is cold.<br>I leave the cafe and suddenly I am in my bedroom.<br>I am wearing a lacy satin night dress.<br><br>I slither next to him in the huge bed that is ours.<br>He swiftly holds me inside his huge arms.<br><br>I whisper to him as my body melts into his:<br><br>\"All I ever wanted was an ordinary life\".<br><br>(To be continued).<br><\/pre>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My name is Mademoiselle Julia.I assassinate people for money.More or less.I take care of my ageing father.He thinks he is an emperor.I am a show girl.More or less.I long for an ordinary life.I must find a way to escape.Take my ageing father with me.Stop the blood that sheds continuously and mercilessly.And with no regret.I am [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1657,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"set","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[23],"tags":[33,34,32,35],"class_list":["post-1654","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-a-writer-in-beirut","tag-fourth-of-august-2020","tag-lebanese-female-writers","tag-lebanese-literature","tag-short-stories-in-beirut"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - 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