Annoying

But you see, sir, dead people are allowed to hang on to any glimpses of life they can find.
And my father says it’s going to be a long summer.
But you wouldn’t understand the notion of death, sir.
Would you now?
Yet summer is still a few days away.

I fight a thousand war on a daily basis.
My biggest war is you. Forever you.
What a pity that you find me annoying. For you are all that I think about.
Yet summer is still a few days away.

The swaying darkness of the early minutes of the evening.
Lovers are starting to fidget and impatiently slap away the remains of the sea from their glowing bodies.
Yet summer is still a few days away.

And I have stopped waiting for you.
For you were never really mine.
And I fight a thousand war on a daily basis.
My toughest war is you.
Forever you.

My parents hardly remember me, nowadays.
They have drifted away from me.
And you find me annoying.
But you see, you are all I ever wanted.
My parents are no longer interested in reality.

Is anyone?

The sun is making its way inside the realms of the story that is the sea.
Am exhausted. From forcing myself to stop thinking about you. 
You find me annoying, don’t you sir?
But you see, you are all I ever wanted.
I search for the remains of my father. He is long gone.
I cannot blame him. Death is waiting for him a few steps away.
Nor can I blame you for not wanting me.

The swaying darkness of the early minutes of the evening.
The fishermen look tired as they start to pack the jewels of the day. I might join them. I should have joined them earlier today. 
Maybe next time. 
The men from my past keep coming back.
And you find me annoying.

I sit by the sea for the longest of time.
And my toughest war is you.
Forever you.
The old dog that haunts the port, has survived the slaughter of a whole country.
Through his ancient solitude, he soothes the wounds of the survivors.
He soothes the dead who remained alive.

You find me annoying.

Don’t worry, I have stopped waiting for you.
But you see, sir, dead people who remain alive are allowed whatever glimpses of life they can hang on to.
The sea is calm as it patiently embraces the resting sun inside the realms of its story.

I am too calm for a woman who dances naked in all the love stories she invades.
At times, I cannot lift my head up when am walking amongst the dead who remained almost alive.
Out of fear of bumping into you.
But you see, sir, you are the toughest war I have ever fought.
And my most painful word is you.
Forever you.
Summer stories are rarely forgotten.
And summer still a few days away.

I waited for you, you know.
Somewhere midst all the drama I constantly create, and the exuberance I fake, I hoped for small rituals.

I dreamed of banalities.
And there is my father, quietly pretending that he is not waiting for death.

I waited for you, you know, before I started cleaning the house so thoroughly it seemed as though I was in fact, cleaning my soul.

But look at us.
Over there in that quiet corner.
You are holding my hand and I have stopped creating stories.
And I have stopped acting dramatically and faking exuberance.

It is really a shame that you find me annoying.

Should I lift my skirt for him?
Slowly.
So slowly it hurts.
Both of us.

Should I undress for him?
Allow him to touch my painful vulnerability?

But look at us.
Over there in that quiet corner.

It really is a shame that you find me annoying.